it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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