I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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