Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
