We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
