is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
