Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
