There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
tell your sister to shave her snatch
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
