i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
my poor anus
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
