Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
