Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
