marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
