Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
