I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
don't judge my taste in strippers
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
