What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
