Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
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