Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You are a booty call, not a friend.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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