i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
