Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
