Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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