Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
The uberlube is also flammable
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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