Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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