I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
