She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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