Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize