The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
