I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Randomize
