i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
