I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
