The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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