Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
