dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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