she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
