I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
