We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
