It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
