By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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