I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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