There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
