I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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