I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize