sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
