office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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