Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
