I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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