Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
