please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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