Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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