Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
