my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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