check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
