what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
