you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
